Today we celebrate and expect a visit from St. Nicholas. So why do I consider him every parent's friend? Well, he can be a huge help for guiding kids' behavior because he has a big book where he notes down all they've done during the year, all the good things and the bad. He rewards the good with chocolate (or gold!) and the bad, with coal (also useful, actually, and an interesting metaphor when you think you burn it).
If you don't expect to have a real visit, it's fine to put out the shoes the night before so they can receive the gifts. Also, you might write a little note to explain where the child is going in a good direction, and where not.
I used this last during my children's teenaged years, although that grew to more of a letter than just a note. But I was always amazed how well they received the complaints, gentle nudges and of course, the praise. Maybe it was because that was somehow more objective and a little removed from Mom. A good rule to follow is, three praises/affirmations to one complaint/request!
Happy St. Nicholas day, everyone. It's okay to reward yourself too!
