You've probably read about the Canadian couple who are keeping their baby's gender a secret. They've engendered (sorry) quite a lot of media attention.
I wondered why this disturbed me, so I began pondering what it might mean, and how this might impact their child. Actually, I doubt it will make a huge difference during the first couple of years. But after that?
Several aspects came up for me. What I'm really disturbed about is the attitude, which comes across to me as using your child as an experiment. Surely this is materialistic? Like regarding the child as a kind of widget?
Here's the thing. I believe that to make any kind of sense of our lives, our destinies, and our connections with other human beings, we have to at least entertain the idea of reincarnation. So, if we look at this as if we come to earth to experience different aspects of the human condition, you'll realize it's very different whether you've come as a man or a woman. There's plenty of documentation to prove this, but seeing as we're focusing on experience, I'd like to offer something from Rudolf Steiner that's been a revelation to me. He says that in general men are too deeply incarnated in their bodies, and women not quite incarnated enough. You can find a fun illustration of this in the June 2 post on Jennifer Crusie's blog http://www.arghink.com Hit 'read more' and then scroll down to the box where you'll see something about telling jokes.
Yes, there's a reason the book 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus' was such a mega best seller, and still is.
It's helpful for our children to see the masculine and the feminine. This is why small children benefit and enjoy it when we, as mothers, grandmothers, nannies, etc., wear long, flowing skirts. Do I? Mostly, not. Since coming to North America I find myself in pants more and more often, although less so in summer.
But a while ago my husband was away for over three weeks, coinciding with March break. Knowing I'd find providing day care for the Blue-eyed Boy as well as Curly-Locks too taxing without his support, I asked my dear Acadian soul-sister to come and be with me. A hippie princess, she still loves to wear those long, floaty skirts. In fact, she deliberately brought along a couple. And I noticed how much Curly-Locks enjoyed them. He'd stand close to her, clutch handfuls of fabric and peep out at me through the folds. Somehow too, that was comforting for him.
Something like this is not imposing on our children in any way, and of course some girls will be
tomboys and some boys will be 'softer' than others. But surely life today is confusing enough without us having to
be confused about our gender?
I guess what I'm really trying to say is that our gender has meaning. Don't you think part of our striving should be to raise our manhood or womanhood to a higher, better level?
