In general, I'm against asking small children questions. Yes, I know this is endemic in our society and I find myself doing it too. But honestly, what are we doing by giving the kids multiple choices? We're actually handing them over the authority that belongs to us as parents and grandparents. And this, I can assure you, will not work in our favour when our children hit the teenage years.
There's another side to the question (!) that I've maybe mentioned before. That is, even us adults suffer from decision fatigue today. This is because every decision we confront makes a demand on our ego. To put decisions onto small children actually takes away from their vitality. And truly, they only come into full ego-hood once they turn twenty-one. Rudolf Steiner says that even the way the foot walks on the earth changes at that time. No, I didn't manage to observe that in my four children.
But sometimes a parent needs to pry. Kids, as we know all too well these days, can be subject to bullying. I remember when our youngest, Ben, was in kindergarten, he kept complaining about a sore neck. I thought this was maybe tonsils, and had a look, but no, his throat wasn't inflamed at all.
The complaint was repeated. I was puzzled. Ben was a child who could usually express what he felt and experienced very well. At last I winkled it out of him. Yes, another boy was 'strangling' him at school. And now that I understood the problem, we were able to address it.
So, as always, be as aware as you can.
